Saturday, September 6, 2008

Friday, September 5, 2008

Dear Little One #14

Dear Little One,

This week you are officially two months old.  You are a smiley, giggly, farty, wiggly thing at a wopping 11 pounds and 23 inches.  

It's been a rough couple of weeks because we moved to Las Vegas, and between the chaos of the move and just being a baby, you have had to adjust to your very own bedroom, different smells, textures and people.  On top of all this, you had to have your vaccinations yesterday, three shots in the legs.  You screamed like I've never heard before.  But you toughened up and got through it like a champ.  I am so proud of you.

Grandma and Anita just left after visiting for a couple of days and helping us settle in to our new residence.  It was very helpful to have them here and daddy and I actually had a date.  We haven't had one of those in over two months, so it was a fun outing.

You have made friends with the ceiling fans and airconditioning grates in this house.  Makes me laugh.  We've affectionately named the fans Windy, Fanny and Blade.  Every morning you coo and smile at the fans.  It's nice that they keep you entertained (even though I've dropped quite a bit of money on toys and gadgets to entertain you that you are not at all interested in).

You have taken to the bathtub.  So much so, you cry when I take you out.  You are going to be a fish.  Maybe the next Michael Phelps - but no pressure.  I asked the doctor when I can take you in the pool and we need to wait a few more months.  I am dying to take you in the pool with me.

You're pooping as I write this... it's a noisy one.  

I love you so much, Hadley.  I'm enjoying watching you grow and develop.  Every day there is something new and I can't wait to see what tomorrow holds.

Much love,

Monday, August 18, 2008

Dear Little One #13

Dear Little One, 

Today marks your sixth week with us.  I can't believe how much you have changed - every day something a little different or a new fascination.  I love that you are intrigued with the mini-blinds, the little bedside lamp on the bed and invisible things on the wall.  You seem to self entertain more and are curious about what is around you, which is wonderful to watch and is also giving us more time to multi-task. 

You also enjoy sitting up and working on holding your head up.  I am amazed at how strong you are at such a young age. Of course, our hands are right there to catch you when you get tired.  You are even baring weight on your little legs and we can see you muscles working.  

Right now you are sleeping in  a little wad next to me on the bed.  I love watching you sleep.  I love watching you cry, but I love watching you sleep more for obvious reasons.  You are so peaceful, the weight of the world has not yet jaded you.  Don't let it.  Life has its ups and downs, its rough times and great times.  Remember it is a rollercoaster and with every down, there will be an up.  Don't let those downs keep you down so you never recognize the ups, because there are so many more ups.

This has been a baby week!  Two little girls have been born to two of my friends.  I hope that you will all meet some day and have a play date.  I can't wait to see you interact with other children, but I know that is a little bit down the road, probably after you have gained control of your arms and legs.

Hadley, I love you so much!  You make me smile constantly (even when your daddy thinks I'm angry because of my scowl).

Much love,


Thursday, August 14, 2008

Funny Faces...

Dear Little One #12

Dear Hadley,

This week you are five weeks old.  Its only been five weeks I know, but I just can't believe how quickly you have grown and developed - they weren't kidding when they said babies grow fast.  You are no longer our little 6lb bundle, you are now 9 1/2 lbs and near 22 inches long.  You are growing beautifully and the doctor's keep assuring your nervous mama that you are perfectly healthy (we've had two "nervous mommy" visits - this is why we spend the big bucks on insurance).

You are a breast feeding champ now!  So much so, its all you want to do.  You have set up a tent and camp on the boob.  Daddy is giving you a bottle of formula in the evenings so my body can catch up and take a break.  I'm happy you are an eating machine, but I do want you to be content and happy taking bottles from other people, so this is a good plan.

We are in the thick of the six week fussies, which isn't fun, especially at bed time.  Today I let you cry yourself to sleep while I got ready to go out.  It broke my heart, especially when you were still trying to catch your breath after your dropped off to sleep.  I know crying is good for you, but its such a tough thing to hear.  I'm sorry little one, but we will probably need to do this more often, but know that we are here and love you very very much.

You took a nap with me today after eating.  You have been able to roll onto your side for a long time, and I found you on your tummy sleeping peacefully when I woke up.  It seems like you are advancing at a rapid pace, which we are thrilled, but also worried that you might smother yourself.  Please be careful and wait to be on your tummy when daddy or I are with you.

We are moving away from San Francisco in a week to a house in Las Vegas.  I love it here and will miss our friends, but I know this move will be a healthy one financially.  It's only for two years, you probably wont even remember living there, and then we will go somewhere great with good schools for you.  There is a pool, which will be fun when you are a little bigger.  You have big feet like your mom's and we are convinced you will be a swimmer.

Hadley, I love you so much.  Even when I'm with you, I miss you.  

Much love,

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Lunatic Mama

Hormones are fun.

Let me rephrase that...

Hormones and no sleep is fun!

I've been a tearful wreck.  I'm not depressed, just exhausted, and these whacky hormones make me cry over everything - the good and the bad.  I know other women know exactly what I am talking about, it just is and its frustrating because you feel stupid about your bout of tears after all is said and done, then you cry that you cried.

I knew baby would change my life and I was (am) ready for it.  I just had no idea.  I think it has felt more overwhelming because the five days I spent in the hospital were not at all filled with rest.  The doctor's and nurses would prescribe sleep, then constantly wake you.  So, it's been an entire month without a solid nights sleep for either Papa J or I, and I don't know if that will improve.

Everyone keeps telling me that now is "survival mode" and things will improve in a couple of weeks.  I am wondering how.  Will I finally get to slumber in the same bed at the same time as Papa J? Will I get to sleep at night like everyone else?  Or will I be forced to constantly sneak in cat naps here and there so I can breast feed the little one every two hours.

Just curious how this pans out...

Don't get me wrong, Hadley is worth every wink of sleep lost.  I just hope that those who are closest to me will be patient while I try to learn to be a normal human being with less sleep.

I'm just tired.